This fluorescent dog walks into a bar...

Hen fever can mean many things, I suppose. But in the late 1800s, there was money to be made in eggs. Especially eggs from the Cochin chickens, which were said to weigh as much as a pound. A nesting pair sold for the outrageous sum of $700, about ten thousand percent more than what chickens usually sold for. Remember the Emu craze?

In 1993, Texas had 83 little towns with six-man football teams. Today, there are about 125 tiny burgs. For a fun read, check out Carlton Stowers book about six-man football: Where Dreams Die Hard. In honor of the Super Bowl, sorta.

Ruppy is a real dog. And he really glows in the dark thanks to transgenics. The pup has genes transplanted from a sea anemone which makes him look like a red fluorescent hound. Somehow, that’s going to be helpful in medical research.

Cows with names give more milk. About six percent more. That’s the research conclusion of a study in England. Apparently humans who will name a cow will also treat the cow better. Calm cows give more milk.
Meet Marilyn.

Old joke but true story. A bear expert was lecturing a bicycle tour group about safety. Someone asked about using pepper spray as a deterrent. The expert answered by explaining you could identify bear scat on the trail by the faint aroma of pepper.

Breaking news: It is snowing again in Minneapolis.

Kick the ball, Charlie Brown

Charlie Brown in Winter. That’s me.

I fall for winter’s spell every time. I always pause to soak in the beauty and the quiet. Hot chocolate, oatmeal and three-alarm chili. I feel so good I forgive the children.

Falling snow just makes you feel good. Fresh powder covers lots of ugly. At first, I forget the grey-to-black ice-iron that snow plows sculpt along the curbs. And I forget the real danger to anything that moves on the streets (200 wrecks yesterday morning).

I know better, but I have to test each fresh snow with a short walk. Short because it’s so damned cold and the wind chill hurts through the muffler. Six-degree weather is probably hard on my pacemaker battery. But pretty, very pretty.

Careful. You’ll bust your tokus. Just ask Charlie Brown.

Governor Farouk Shami of Texas

Even for Texas, this guy Farouk Shami is a stretch. He’s a rich Palestinian hair dresser from Houston who hires lots of lawyers, wears lots of red boots and is running for Governor of Texas. Farouk says rather than live in the Governor’s Mansion, he would turn it into an orphanage. That’s too easy. The mansion already has a history of housing some real bastards. Some with good hair.

Thirty-five minutes per day. That’s how much time we hard copy subscribers spend reading the New York Times. (Slower, if you move your lips.) But e-visitors spend only 34 minutes a month reading on screen. Correspondingly, advertisers spend only one-tenth online of what they spend in print.

Still, there are lots of hits every day – over 1.3 billion pages are viewed before sunset. That generates at least $51 million in daily advertising throughout the Web. It is said that over 700,000 people make a living on eBay.

Forget the baseball bat. Wasp spray is the better home protection. Most cans have a range of 20-to-30 foot and the stuff blinds the attacker until he can get to a hospital. Keep a can near the bed -- away from the electric blanket.

Researchers at the University of Sunderland and Durham University have developed a whimsical looking "prototype cognitive helmet" that "bathes the brain with infra-red light and stimulates the growth of brain cells. Its creators believe it could reverse the symptoms of dementia - such as memory loss and anxiety - after only four weeks. Hope so. Sounds far-fetched to be true.

Want buns of steel?

Sub-freezing weather, apparently no problem for hearty Minnesota bicycle riders. Sub-zero thins the herd.

Worth the boost? Battery-powered bikes reach speeds up to 30 mph. Green, yes. Safe, doubtful. At that speed, electric bikes are twice as fast as most leisure riders. Should they ride in bike lanes?

There’s a dude in California who makes a school bus out of bamboo. Actually, it’s a seven-place bicycle and everybody has to pedal, but it is made of bamboo, which grows on every continent. Perfect for developing nations. No, silly, they don't make them out of hemp.

In 1896, a division of Buffalo Soldiers rode bicycles from Missoula, Montana, to Yellowstone – and back. That’s 800 miles on rudimentary bikes.

The first Tour de France Cycliste was a mad dash of 1,509 miles spread over six days. The year was 1903.

If you are young, you roll dehydrated, sore, cramping. If you are older, you cruise on a friendlier bike. Either way, on the bike, we find solace, clarity, perspective. A mental re-boot. And we are healthier for it. Saddle up.

Two faces of politics

Please excuse the absence. We had some personal sadness to deal with. A good friend is making repeated trips to the hospital. Another was killed when she was struck by a car while vacationing in New Zealand. Out of town friends and relatives occupied our memories. Frankly, I just didn’t feel like writing. But gradually, the warmth of old, old friendships helped us find the joy behind the sadness. And that’s what our lost friend would want. Hell, she would have demanded it.

So here goes.

Did you catch the stunning Obama speech on TV? Not the State of the Union, although it was pretty good. But his debate with the Republican caucus was high political drama. How many people do you know who have the political spine to stand alone in front of 140 people who oppose the ground you walk on? Better still, how many would insist that the TV cameras keep rolling? Clearly, President Obama was the smartest guy in the room. And he continues to try to break the terrible partisan logjam that is Washington. CSPAN will repeat the 80 minute program. Worth watching. Five stars.

Have you been following the other drama flurrying around next week’s Tea Party Convention. Two wingnut heroes of the movement — Reps. Michele Bachmann (R-MN) and Marsha Blackburn (R-TN) — have withdrawn as speakers while supporters hint something is scammy. Sarah Palin, however, is still on board to get her hundred grand for keynoting. She is calling for the Tea Baggers and the Republicans to merge. But Palin came under Tea Party fire herself – for supporting John McCain in his senate re-election bid. Can you spell litmus? Can you draw a circular firing squad?

In closing, the obvious: It’s damn cold in Minnesota this time of year.