Thursday, March 1, 2007

Caution: Blue Material

I'm cool. And I have proof.

Because I have a pacemaker and a defibrillator, I side-step the security devices at the airport and endure the mandatory manual pat-down. Otherwise, the security devices might jiggle the electronics in my chest.

Pause. Do not, I repeat, do not feel sorry for me because of the pacemaker/defibrillator. I feel good. I still ride my bicycle but I doubt I'll manage any more 70 mile trips. Ten miles do nicely. There.

Back up a bit. Minneapolis is enriched by many immigrants from nations that might surprise you. The Hmong from Cambodia. Somalians from Africa. Often we are surrounded with wonderful accents from our new neighbors. Like the original immigrants from the Scandinavian countries whose accents still lilt throughout the Twin Cities.

We were going through early morning security at the Minneapolis airport when this black security agent with what sounded like a Jamaican accent started saying: "Mon, you let the dogs out."

I'm hip. I had heard that music before. Hip hop, was it? So I snapped my fingers and repeated back to him: "Who, who, who let the dogs out."

The look on his face!

"No, mon, your pants are unzipped. You're letting the dogs out."


annie'sbuddie said...

i keep anticipating what i'm going to have to endure when i finally fly with my new steel hip joint. i can only imagine what sort of search i will be subjected to...but at least i don't have to worry about it getting wacked out of timing.
figure it will just be an opportunity for a long overdue mooning just to make a statement of sorts as to what i think about all this HLS BS.

Anonymous said...

Re: suggestion box. Rather than saying "in many instances" do bloggers break news stories, you should say "in a rare case or two" bloggers have done so.

I'm sure there is a web site to back up this fact.

Denise said...

For our boys, it was 'XYZ' -- eXamine Your Zipper. It worked until, of course, I realized that the whole world knew the code term for XYZ. There are times I'm sooooo glad I'm a girl...

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