The New York Times is forcing me to come out of the closet: I am an intellectual.
Entry-level, no doubt. But, according to the NYT criteria, I am, nonetheless, an intellectual. There is no known cure. Nature or nurture, who cares?
How do I come to this shocking conclusion? While reading the Monday NYTimes article on YouTube for ideas (clearly an oxymoron), I came across a description of Arts and Letters Daily, as an offshoot of the Chronicle of Higher Education, seeking to serve intellectuals.
Well, hell. I've been reading Arts and Letters for years. I even have a link on this blog site. Ergo, I must be an intellectual.
Question:if I'm already out as an intellectual, must I also read the new venture? It is called Big Think. Every time I tried to go to the new site, my computer crashed. Clearly proving once again that I am an intellectual because I am smarter than this damn computer.
In conclusion, I offer earlier proof of my mental prowess. I attended an evening lecture at the University of Texas recently. The PhD speaker presented the Mexican version of the Alamo. Shocking, I tell you, shocking. John Wayne and Davy Crockett are spinning in their graves. Redundant, you say?
Later, I was describing my outrage to a long-time friend and I pointed out that I must be an intellectual. Why? Because I didn't hit the S.O.B. professor.
Truly an intelligent response, my friend observed.
I rest my case.