Wednesday, March 26, 2008

Old Testament REVENGE!

When old hippies go straight, there are consequences.

The Mystery Woman, formerly known as Earth Momma, hasn’t had a dishwasher or ice maker for more than 30 years. By choice!

“Too noisy,” she always dismissed the notion. “Can’t hear my music with the dishwasher running.” I might as well reveal this now – she dances in the kitchen while slicing and dicing.

Well, that program of denial worked well in Minneapolis. Everyone was always so busy putting on or taking off layers that no one noticed. There’s always plenty of ice in MN. That's why people move there.

However, the Austin condo has both dishwasher and ice maker. She was curious. Her resistance finally evaporated when she learned the infernal dishwasher could be programmed to run after midnight while we sleep. Joy!

But the ice maker is a different venue. Mostly, it runs when it damned well pleases. And the crumpled, muffled noise it makes as ice dumps into the tray. The Mystery Woman found it inspiring.

Inspiring?

Yes. Every time she gets miffed at me, she dumps the ice into the sink. The gallant ice maker, sensing a void, begins to re-load. An hour or so later when I am least expecting it, the ice maker offloads into the plastic tub. The racket always, always catches me by surprise. And every time I jump, the Mystery Woman chuckles softly to herself.

Surely, you saw this coming: She believes revenge is a dish best served cold.

1 comment:

Ken Martin said...

Three cheers for the mystery woman! My lady has equally sneaky ways of pulling jokes on me. I have a habit of spewing curses when my computer misbehaves. (Must have something to do with my twenty-plus years in cursing school, otherwise know as the US Marine Corps.) In retaliation she glued a bright orange key on my computer keyboard that's labeled with the symbols X%&#!. Since I'm a touch typist I never look at my keyboard and it took about six months for me to notice it. I'd been had.

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