Our sex life was so bad that I got a life-size poster of Paul Newman and thumb-tacked it to the ceiling in our bedroom. I was hoping that looking up at Cool Hand Luke might inspire my then-wife.
No such luck and I soon forgot about the poster on the ceiling.
Later, her elderly parents were visiting and we always gave them our bed. The old people never said a word about the Paul Newman sharing their bedroom. During the third night, I heard this muffled scrumple and a yelp.
The poster had fallen on the in-laws. And I left it to her to explain.
I thought the alimony award was excessive.