Monday, November 24, 2008

Mad Max in a minivan

Get back in your house. Do not follow us.

We are the last of a kind. We are hunters/gathers. We are snowbirds chasing the sun, searching the horizon for the mountaintop experience -- and a place to get our prescriptions filled.

Only the toughest survive the semi-annual trek from north to south, from lefse to Tex-Mex. We won’t even discuss lutefisk or mountain oysters.

I know. You have romanticized the open road all your life. But remember that Jack Kerouac and Willie Nelson wrote that stuff while still in their thirties. And if he were alive today, Marlon Brando couldn’t mount a Harley with a footstool.

Forget the images of Errol Flynn and Maureen O’Hara in rut. Clear your mind.

Now, imagine Gabby Hayes in his trusty Conestoga bitching about his sore backside and looking for a Best Western before sundown.

Get ready for the rigors that start with making 42 contacts (via phone, computer, post card, or smoke signal) regarding change of address. Hell, I doubt I still have 42 friends still living.

Besides, the Post Office is going to screw it up for the first six weeks no matter how many Forever Stamps you buy.

Pioneers are always intense.


The South Plainsman said...

We try to do very little travel by auto. Airplanes and ships are much more comfortable.

When we do travel by car, I do feel just like old Gabby.

If any of you are fans of John Wayne in "The Searchers" I prefer to be old Mose in his rocking chair. LOL

Anonymous said...

I drive everywhere due to the fact that my Dr. says that if I try to fly again that it's 99.9% certain that I'll burst my eardrums.
I used to fly a lot but it seems that I got too close to the bang end of too many big guns.
I keep telling myself that I'm a tough old bird, but in reality I'm just a worn out old crow.----Goose

JohnSBoles said...

I know a couple of folks who also spent some time with big guns. Though I don't know you, what I read from you here suggests you are not a "worn out old crow". My guess is you have done your fair share for God and Country.

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