Saturday, October 17, 2009

Whiskey River and Burned Bridges

It’s 34 degrees this morning in Minneapolis. Were I in Texas, I would be slicing open a javelina and crawling inside to keep warm. Up here, I found myself saying, “It’s only 34 degrees outside, the sun is shining, I think I’ll take a walk.” OMG, I’m ruined.

Get this: two weeks before he died, Charles Darwin wrote a short paper about a tiny clam hitchhiking on the leg of a water beetle. The guy who sent him the beetle was shoemaker and amateur naturalist who had a son who had a son named Francis Crick. In 1953, young Francis and another American made a discovery that would lead to the triumphant vindication of almost everything Darwin said. To wit: every organism carries a chemical code inside its cells. They call it DNA. And there would be no NCIS without it. Nor CSI. Nor ...

Head injury patients are less likely to die if they have drunk alcohol. Ignoring the high probability that alcohol likely contributed to the cause of the head injury in the first place, some geniuses advocate greeting the patients at E.R. with a drink.

Robert Altman, the late movie director, enjoyed creating fake country-music song titles like: “I’m Swimming Through the Ashes of All the Bridges I’ve Burned.”


Jeff Hebert said...

It's funny, as I was reading this a country song was playing on the radio that goes "I'd be drowning in tears if these walls could cry."

Blog of Ages said...

My earliest music memory was a Cajun tune called "Peeping through the Keyhole, Watching Jole Blon." To this day, Jole Blon is a Southern sweetheart.

My second early memory is the lament "My Bucket's Got a Hole in It and I can't Buy No Beer."

Anonymous said...

Gary P. Nunn told Bill Arhos he was working on a song titled "If You Won't Leave Me Alone, I'll Find Someone Who Will." Bob

Anonymous said...

Get Your Tongue Outta My Mouth 'Cause I'm Kissing You Goodbye

Here is a link to some truly hilarious country song titles.


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