Wednesday, June 9, 2010

Moon over Miami (pun)

Have you ever seen the catalogue from the Vermont Country Store? The venerable mail order business has been in the Orton family since 1946. Sweet stuff. Old fashioned. Suspenders, hand mowers, caftans, Modern, too. Now you can order a “full assortment of intimate solutions” and they vibrate. Guaranteed to arrive in a brown paper wrapper. When did this happen?

Up here in Minnesota, we have learned there is power in the potholes. They can scare hell outta the unwary driver and tear hell outta your vehicle. Now comes a firm who has invented a gizmo that converts the mayhem into electricity. GenShocks actually harvests energy that you can use in your hybrid. If this catches on, I’m going to quit driving in Minneapolis. Hmmm. Use this technology to harness the energy from the Country Store item above and you could light up Miami. You have?

Remember when you were 49 and a half and how indignant you were to get an unsolicited AARP card in the mail? Well triple that when The Scooter Store finds you and starts the incoming mail barrage. How did they find me 1,300 miles from Texas?

From the Collectables Direct catalogue you can order a spiffy multi-function walking stick. This fancy cane is adjustable and packs a 5 LED flashlight – plus an alarm and three flashing lights. Change your design to tote a couple of jiggers of Scotch and it’s a deal.

2 comments:

The South Plainsman said...

I sent them your address. lol

Ken Martin said...

The walking stick item reminded me of a gag gift I once got for a friend, a can with a rubber-bulb horn and a rear view mirror. Good for a laugh anyway.

Keep 'em coming, George.

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