Monday, December 12, 2011

Return of the geezer-hunk

Three times a day, our dog takes me outside for obvious reasons. In addition to training me about hygiene, she is working on my vocabulary.

One day, I get this idea to start jogging. I don’t know why. I never jogged as a young man. Preferred the bicycle. What the hell. I’ve got new batteries in the pacemaker, let’s give it a go. This will surely jazz up my medical charts.

My first attempts were pathetic. Not even ten yards. Poof. Honey, can you come get me. My legs were stiff. I couldn’t even skip-jump a curb. The results of allowing myself to whine on the couch five years following too many surgeries. Bad idea.

Gradually, my stamina is returning. I can now run fifty yards. Three times a day. Watch for me in your neighborhood. The old guy holding the plastic bag as far from his body as he can. Accompanied by a mini Dachshund with a big grin. Got the image?

What the hell, it amuses the dog -- and the neighbors -- and keeps my heart pumping.

Perhaps I should correct my over-statement. Perhaps “jog” is too strong a word to describe this new action. It’s more like a lope. You know, like the handlers in the Westminister Dog Show.

The Mystery Woman thinks we’re going to win Best in Show.


Anonymous said...

Oh you are just so cute. Makes me want to chuck all your chins.

Jeff Hebert said...

I'd vote for you, that's for sure!

The South Plainsman said...

The next thing to go will be your joints.

Clearly, your mind is already gone. lol

Ken Martin said...

Go for it, George, go for it!

paula said...

Just keep your tail up and you nose pointed forward. No stopping to scratch or sniff.

Escaped Waco Alive said...

Do da word "walkin'" mean anything to you, George? Far more refined, dignified, reasonable. Darn fine exercise, too.

As the Cajun momma said to the cute D.A. (Ellen Barkin...woof!) attired in jogging duds in the movie THE BIG EASY, "Why for you dressed like dat?"

"I've been running," the cute D.A. replied.

"From what, cher?" replied the wise Cajun momma.

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